Maxwell’s Story
Our sweet Maxy, or Papoose as his dad called him, is the baby that completed our family. Chase and I were married in 2019, a family of 4 with his twin daughters Aubrey and Kaylee. After 2 years of struggle we went though IVF to have our first son, Alex, in 2023. Thinking we were done and couldn't have any more children we were surprised to get a positive pregnancy test when Alex was 6 months old. Scared and excited, we were so happy to welcome Maxwell Wayne Krueger on August 27, 2024. Max was the perfect addition to our family, Chase gave him the nickname "Papoose" after we heard it on a nature show in reference to a baby beaver. Max had all the best qualities, he was so even tempered, such a good eater, had 2 perfect birth marks, soft beautiful hair, chunky legs, arms, and cheeks, goofy crooked front teeth, and beautiful blue eyes. He had the most adorable laugh and would babble at anyone who would talk to him. He was a people watcher at heart, and when he got excited, he would give the cutest wave of his hands as you came to pick him up. His favorite places were his bouncy chair and swing where he could watch his family at his leisure. He was his daddy's best friend, his sisters' admirer, his brother's biggest fan, and his mommy's baby.
Monday, June 2nd was a normal day. I got up with the boys. I was going out of town for work that day, so I had to leave the boys with my brother to take them to daycare. I dressed Maxy in my favorite outfit of his, a light blue striped romper. His color from before birth has always been light blue - he had the perfect eyes to go with it too. I remember him softly biting my shoulder that morning as I got his bottle ready. I remember giving him goobery open-mouthed kisses - the best kisses from Max. And then I left. I drove over an hour to Ankeny for a work training, only to receive the worst phone call of my life just after 1 pm from the daycare provider. Max had stopped breathing during his afternoon nap and was headed to the hospital via ambulance. I had to make the drive, alone, for over an hour. Chase got there first. As soon as he was by Max's side they called me. We both spoke to Max and his heartbeat came back. My Maxy and Chase's Papoose came back to us. Our hope was restored. It was going to be OK. I arrived and was immediately at his side. His eyelids had color and his hair was all spiked and adorable. I kissed him all over, despite all the cords and tubes. The men and women at Compass Memorial Hospital in Marengo were so gentle and kind. They showed our family how much each and every one of them cared for our sweet boy. We will never forget their incredible kindness, despite the horrific outcome.
Max was life flighted to the University of Iowa. We drove up and waited over 2 hours to get any news, news that crushed our souls and shattered our hearts. His blood pressure was not going up, his blood was no longer clotting, and his tests were all out of range; his body was shutting down on him. All we could do was sit with our baby until he left us. He gave us time. All of our family got to come and say goodbye. I got to hold my sweet baby, lay down with him and hold his hand for hours and sleep with him. When the time came, Chase, Aubrey, and I held him as his heart beat for the last time.
He will live on with us forever. His short but big life changed all of ours. Our perspective and values in life are now shifted to be better and do better for Maxy. We will forever honor and love him in everything that we do.
This devastating loss has brought so many wonderful organizations and people into our lives. Our eyes have been opened to the true good in the world.
We would not be where we are today without the support from Walk With You, specifically Kylie Collins, who has gone above and beyond to help us. From gaining assistance for Maxy's funeral and monument to helping us design a special sticker in honor of our Max that we can put on our cars, his sister's softball helmet, and other important places where we can share his story. Through Walk With You we have been able to find other organizations where we can connect with people like us who have lost a child to SUID/SIDS or other losses. We are so hopeful that through this loss we can find more reason, more ways to make the world a better place. Just like how we have been shown there is so much good in the world, we too want to make a difference in other people's lives, to honor our Maxwell and share him with other people who would have otherwise never have known his name.
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